There we are, three sleep deprived Bon Jovi fans, tooling down the Jersey Turnpike looking for our hotel with Shelley at the wheel and a english challenged hotel owner on the cel. You can't make a u-turn in the state to save our lives, no one lets you merge and hotel dude is telling me to follow the signs to the 109! It is twenty minutes later, when I feel like I am in a bad Twilight Zone episode that we finally see signs to the ONE AND NINE! It is then that I realize these Jersey trips are like childbirth: frustrating to go through but when you are done all you remember is the joy! "You travel all the way here to see them" is a much asked question when natives inevitably find out we are from California and Georgia. The resounding answer is yes, given with huge smiles on our faces!
Lucky for us we aren't there solely to navigate the highways and byways of the Garden State. We make the trip to mecca to see the Jovi boys on their home turf! In their backyard! For the Bon Jovi faithful, there is no better place to be when the guys play at home! For any band, the hometown shows are special and for Bon Jovi and their fans, those shows are at Giants Stadium! The Meadowlands! These shows have closed out the last three tours and have become must see in the land of Jovi! The band is on, there is electricity in the air and this year that was even more true with the lightning! It is cool to say that I was there for both "rain" shows that have taken place at Giant's the last two tours! In 2003, the band played on as we all "took a shower" together! This year, due to the lightning, the band came out for the 1st encore, sped through "Livin On A Prayer" and called it a night 20 minutes early! Despite the shortened show, it is a great feeling to know you are a part of something special, rain or no rain! The shows are great and a huge reason why we go. But they aren't the only reason! There is definite joy in seeing the place where your heroes grew up! You feel a connection seeing where Tommy and Gina grew up, went to high school,worked to pay the bills before the music thing took off! Seeing the homes they grew up in and the ones your concert money helped them buy today is great! You might call it stalking when you see my pictures of Jon's house from outside his gate. I call it seeing where my money went! If I hadn't spent all that money, maybe I could actually afford a double scoop at Crazee's! But knowing that I, in some small part, helped pay for the boat that is attached to the dock that is outside the massive chateau that Jon lives in somehow makes it ok! :)
The last couple of tours we have thrown in side trips into NYC! The first time, I was a little nervous! This native Southern Californian has heard all the stories of how crowded and dirty NYC is and how rude the people are! After my first trip, I couldn't imagine where the stories came from. Ok...i'll give ya crowded...maybe dirty! But the people are some of the nicest and friendliest people you will meet anywhere! Including L.A! I venture to say the people here are ruder by far! I LOVE NY!!! The energy, the people, the cops! They don't call those strapping hunks "New York's Finest" for nothing! And where else can you chase people with shopping carts down an alley to buy Pink Prada bags for $20! Shelley chasing that guy with Cindy close behind is a sight i'll never forget! I think we ended up with 5 or 6 Pradas between us with Cindy coming in the winner with 3! Sure, they aren't real but neither was the $10 Rolex I bought 1/2 a block down the street! I stood there and laughed at the irony that the only thing real on me that day was my tan and my boobs! How un-L.A. of me!
Another huge reason to go on these trips is to be with friends! We don't see each other very often and being stuck in a car lost in NJ is a great way to reconnect! LOL! Seriously, who better to understand why the hamburgers taste better at the White Castle in Sayreville NJ than other Jovi fans! It isn't all Bon Jovi! We talked about crazy men and the women that love them...us! We laughted at other tourists and just all around had a great time! As Cindy and I hung out in Newark Airport for 6 hours after we dropped Shelley off, we decided to hang up our NJ shoes! SURE! It's only been a month and I have already forgotten the frustration of the turnpike and started counting down the years (then days) until I am back there again! This time I will know to look for the 1 and 9!
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About Me

- Cynthia
- I am a single native Californian who is looking for love in all the wrong places! Fun-loving, soul-searching, all around crazy.......that's me! :) I believe in the inherent goodness of people, the power of music to restore the soul and the healing properties of a Vente nonfat latte! I believe there is nothing better than a gourgous sunrise, making people laugh, the unconditional love of a dog and a Luc Robitaille game-winning goal with 30-seconds left on the clock! I believe in God, my friends and the spirit of Rock and Roll!
My Inspiration
I used to be disgusted,
now I try to be amused.
~~Elvis Costello
now I try to be amused.
~~Elvis Costello
Followers
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- NFL (2)
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- Special Olympics (2)
They say sometimes to grow as a human, things must change. It makes sense. When you are comfortable, when everything is going great, when life is wonderful, why would you want to change, to grow? You don't! Change is scary and sometimes it hurts like hell!
Four years ago I went through one of the most painful changes in my life. My family decided to up and leave me! They all moved to Arizona and didn't even ask me to go! My mom was moving because financially she would be better off. My sister and her kids were going so they could help Mom with our aging Grandfather! I wasn't asked to go because my Mom and I don't get along.......to say the least!
It hurt.........big time! I can remember driving home after finding out! I was crying my eyes out, feeling very alone and unloved! These people were supposed to love me, be here to support me! Now they were saying "buh bye" without even a thought if I cared or not! But as God often does, he closed that door and opened another one!
The very weekend my family was moving, my friend Kellie invited me to go to church with her. She said I would really like the pastor that was speaking and really should check it out! I figured it would be better than sitting home crying so I went. The pastor speaking was great! He was dynamic, interesting and peaked my interest!
I became a hit and miss attender at the church. Each week I would walk in, listen to the music, and start bawling! I couldn't figure out why but started going back weekly. One Sunday, it finally hit me! That place, that church was exactly what I was missing! God would fill the hole left by my family leaving!
That afternoon I went to classes that explained what the church was all about. It was there that they introduced all the pastors, including the one that spoke in the service earlier. Turns out he is the Worship Arts Pastor....the choir director! I ran up to him after the class and introduced myself. I asked him about joining choir. He was very friendly and explained that choir required no audition! I was excited and made me feel very comfortable about joining a group of people I had never met. Choir became my family as did the church! I met so many friends! Families that welcomed me as one of their own! I lived for choir weekends! The music was contemporary and it was great to sing again! I was so amazed that something this fun was for the glory of God!
And that pastor? He became more than just a pastor to me! He became a friend. He was so instrumental in my getting my life turned around. He was the first person I met at RP and the first pastor I heard speak! He baptized me! He had faith in me and my testimony and asked me to share it with the congregation! When he trusted me with his kids, his house, his dog, he made me see that I wasn't the screw-up in those areas that my own family made me feel I was! He sat in his office and gave me invaluable advice many times! He and his wife helped me see the value in marriage and that they can work!
His family blessed my life as well! It was his wonderful wife that opened her home to our small group and made it warm and inviting! She taught me how to use our musical gifts to serve God with love and humility! Her smile and warm hugs made me feel great on many occasions! Their amazing kids have blessed my life with their laughter and the fun I have had with them will never be forgotten!
Well.......like my family before them, my church family is changing as well. That pastor and his family that I love so much are moving!! He is going to head up the Arts ministry for a large chuch about an hour down the freeway! Sure it's only an hour away! It's within visiting distance. But it's a change! The change isn't scary, it's the unknown that is a result that is scary! While the change is good for the pastor and his family, it breaks the heart of all of us that have served with them the last 6 years! This was their last weekend at church and I have never been a part of something so incredibly sad........and yet so rewarding! It hurts us to let them go but it is exciting to think of the new possibilites of who God is bringing in!
When I think back to how much it hurt to let my family move to Arizona, I smile! I smile because of all the the positive changes that came as a result of that move! I subsequently moved in with my wonderful roommate who is my best friend, mom, shrink and moral compass all rolled into one! I was also led to church where I found my loving church family! I became fullfilled.......whole.......never happier! And within that love and happiness, I found the courage to have the gastric bypass surgery that resulted in my 100 pound weight loss! So God took that painful situation and used it for good in my life! I have no reason to think He won't do the same with this situation as well!
I know it is for the best for all involved but if it's God's will.......why does he make it hurt so much!? Is it to make us more Christlike? Less complacent? I don't know! Change is difficult and it can hurt like crazy! But if we hang on comfortably to what we know, how can that allow God to work in our lives? It is the hearts and love of those moving that we will mis the most! Who's to say God doesn't plan on using us for that same purpose in someone else's life? Some new and lonely person may wander up to Rocky Peak and ask me about choir! :)
Faith is believing in what we can't see. Faith is what will get me through this change......and all the other changes that will happen in life! I will grow as result. I do know I am hanging tight to my faith in a God who only wants the best for all of us! Like this post? Please share it, bookmark it or leave a comment.
Four years ago I went through one of the most painful changes in my life. My family decided to up and leave me! They all moved to Arizona and didn't even ask me to go! My mom was moving because financially she would be better off. My sister and her kids were going so they could help Mom with our aging Grandfather! I wasn't asked to go because my Mom and I don't get along.......to say the least!
It hurt.........big time! I can remember driving home after finding out! I was crying my eyes out, feeling very alone and unloved! These people were supposed to love me, be here to support me! Now they were saying "buh bye" without even a thought if I cared or not! But as God often does, he closed that door and opened another one!
The very weekend my family was moving, my friend Kellie invited me to go to church with her. She said I would really like the pastor that was speaking and really should check it out! I figured it would be better than sitting home crying so I went. The pastor speaking was great! He was dynamic, interesting and peaked my interest!
I became a hit and miss attender at the church. Each week I would walk in, listen to the music, and start bawling! I couldn't figure out why but started going back weekly. One Sunday, it finally hit me! That place, that church was exactly what I was missing! God would fill the hole left by my family leaving!
That afternoon I went to classes that explained what the church was all about. It was there that they introduced all the pastors, including the one that spoke in the service earlier. Turns out he is the Worship Arts Pastor....the choir director! I ran up to him after the class and introduced myself. I asked him about joining choir. He was very friendly and explained that choir required no audition! I was excited and made me feel very comfortable about joining a group of people I had never met. Choir became my family as did the church! I met so many friends! Families that welcomed me as one of their own! I lived for choir weekends! The music was contemporary and it was great to sing again! I was so amazed that something this fun was for the glory of God!
And that pastor? He became more than just a pastor to me! He became a friend. He was so instrumental in my getting my life turned around. He was the first person I met at RP and the first pastor I heard speak! He baptized me! He had faith in me and my testimony and asked me to share it with the congregation! When he trusted me with his kids, his house, his dog, he made me see that I wasn't the screw-up in those areas that my own family made me feel I was! He sat in his office and gave me invaluable advice many times! He and his wife helped me see the value in marriage and that they can work!
His family blessed my life as well! It was his wonderful wife that opened her home to our small group and made it warm and inviting! She taught me how to use our musical gifts to serve God with love and humility! Her smile and warm hugs made me feel great on many occasions! Their amazing kids have blessed my life with their laughter and the fun I have had with them will never be forgotten!
Well.......like my family before them, my church family is changing as well. That pastor and his family that I love so much are moving!! He is going to head up the Arts ministry for a large chuch about an hour down the freeway! Sure it's only an hour away! It's within visiting distance. But it's a change! The change isn't scary, it's the unknown that is a result that is scary! While the change is good for the pastor and his family, it breaks the heart of all of us that have served with them the last 6 years! This was their last weekend at church and I have never been a part of something so incredibly sad........and yet so rewarding! It hurts us to let them go but it is exciting to think of the new possibilites of who God is bringing in!
When I think back to how much it hurt to let my family move to Arizona, I smile! I smile because of all the the positive changes that came as a result of that move! I subsequently moved in with my wonderful roommate who is my best friend, mom, shrink and moral compass all rolled into one! I was also led to church where I found my loving church family! I became fullfilled.......whole.......never happier! And within that love and happiness, I found the courage to have the gastric bypass surgery that resulted in my 100 pound weight loss! So God took that painful situation and used it for good in my life! I have no reason to think He won't do the same with this situation as well!
I know it is for the best for all involved but if it's God's will.......why does he make it hurt so much!? Is it to make us more Christlike? Less complacent? I don't know! Change is difficult and it can hurt like crazy! But if we hang on comfortably to what we know, how can that allow God to work in our lives? It is the hearts and love of those moving that we will mis the most! Who's to say God doesn't plan on using us for that same purpose in someone else's life? Some new and lonely person may wander up to Rocky Peak and ask me about choir! :)
Faith is believing in what we can't see. Faith is what will get me through this change......and all the other changes that will happen in life! I will grow as result. I do know I am hanging tight to my faith in a God who only wants the best for all of us! Like this post? Please share it, bookmark it or leave a comment.
WAHOO!!! I am finally shopping in a regular clothes store! Cathy and I were walking around Hollywood and Highland with her daughter. I got a bright idea about stopping in the Gap just to see if anything fit! IT DID!!! I fit into a XL t-shirt but it still fit! I didn't even have to shove anything into it! It fit! Can I tell you how exciting this is? I can see this will be the start of my clothes obsession! Great! Just as I am getting out of debt!
:) Like this post? Please share it, bookmark it or leave a comment.
:) Like this post? Please share it, bookmark it or leave a comment.
A weekend in Big Bear! Just what the doctor ordered! I just didn't know just how much I needed that weekend until the drive home Sunday! Stressed out more than I knew over dissolving friendship with Michelle and friendship in question with Band Boy, I headed up to the Womans Retreat, looking for answers! Lisa confiscated my cel phone on the drive up so I had no phone and no TV until I got home.....yikes!! With no distraction, I was able to think and get a grip before my life veered completely out of control.
It was a great weekend for reflection. I thought about: friendships. The ones you ditch and the ones you keep. The kind of friends I want and the kind of friend I want to be. Obviously in light of what has been going on with me the last couple of weeks, it was a topic hot and heavy on my mind. So with my friends from my lifegroup we cried.......journaled.....prayed......and talked! And through it all the belief that everyone and everything comes into your life for a reason was reconfirmed in a big way! Some stay........some go.........but all touch your life and through lessons learned change it forever.
It was also a weekend for renewal. Spirtual and physical! The physical renewal came at the perfect place! The weather was gourgous! We hiked up a hill and I faced my fear of heights to do what they call the zip line. You climb to the top of a very tall hill with a harness on. They attach you to a cable and you run down the hill, lift up in the air and "zip" across this field to the top of a hill on the other side! The cool thing was last year I couldn't have even attempted to climb the hill, much less zip across a cable! I swear, I am an active girl trapped in a fat girls body! But not for much longer. The the need toget the rest of the weight off was brought right back to the forefront of my mind! Right where it needs to be!
The spiritual renewal came from being up there in the mountains with God and 176 women who came with issues all their own, no less severe to them as mine were to me! We had seminars, services and a big bonfire Saturday night! It was at the bonfire that they gave us paper to write on what we had learned and what we were leaving behind! We were to then throw it in a suitcase, leaving our baggage behind! I left behind jealousy, unhealthy eating habits and my fear of being single forever! It's all a work in progress but I feel much better about the journey!
I do have to admit, I was sitting at the bonfire Saturday when someone said "I can't believe it's 11:00! And I thought of Band Boy at Oh Gradys and I missed being there and wondered if I was missed! Then I realized it didn't matter! God brought me up to that mountain for a reason! The reason being to see that my relationship with Band Boy masks a fear of being single for the rest of my life! And to realize He has wonderful things planned and I shouldn't be afraid! Trust Him! His love is all I need.
This weekend made me realize a lot of things and the main one was the extreme need to get my life back in balance. Before this weekend I didn't know how to do it. Well, I did......but was just afraid that if I did, my friendship with Band Boy would suffer. What if I didn't go to a gig and wasn't missed? So what! Now I can totally see our friendship will suffer (and has to some degree) by me NOT balancing my life! I may not go to every gig......every night........9-1! That doesn't mean I am not supporting Band Boy or believe in him any less than I have before. It means I am working on being the kind of friend I would want to have and the friend I know I can be. That can only be accomplished by getting my life centered and balanced!
I need to trust God by not manipulating the situation! I need to let go and let Him work, not just in me but in Band Boy as well! Only God knows what path Band Boy is on and how I am getting in the way! I knew I was in moving in the right direction when I sat in the chapel before we left Big Bear and prayed. Not for me.......for Band Boy. I prayed that God would bring him the love of his life, the woman who is everything he dreams of and everything he deserves! He is so worthy of that........and so am I. So I prayed that letting go of this situation will allow God to work in both our lives and bring us what we want and need.
So if the objective of the trip was to get away, it was accomplished. If it was to reconnect with my lifegroup friends, it was accomplished in a big way! If it was to gain balance and centering......it is... in the process of being accomplished. I went wanting to reconnect with God, who loves me more than anyone. I went wanting to get peace within my head and my heart. On all levels, the weekend was beyond everything I expected. It was a true gift from God! Like this post? Please share it, bookmark it or leave a comment.
It was a great weekend for reflection. I thought about: friendships. The ones you ditch and the ones you keep. The kind of friends I want and the kind of friend I want to be. Obviously in light of what has been going on with me the last couple of weeks, it was a topic hot and heavy on my mind. So with my friends from my lifegroup we cried.......journaled.....prayed......and talked! And through it all the belief that everyone and everything comes into your life for a reason was reconfirmed in a big way! Some stay........some go.........but all touch your life and through lessons learned change it forever.
It was also a weekend for renewal. Spirtual and physical! The physical renewal came at the perfect place! The weather was gourgous! We hiked up a hill and I faced my fear of heights to do what they call the zip line. You climb to the top of a very tall hill with a harness on. They attach you to a cable and you run down the hill, lift up in the air and "zip" across this field to the top of a hill on the other side! The cool thing was last year I couldn't have even attempted to climb the hill, much less zip across a cable! I swear, I am an active girl trapped in a fat girls body! But not for much longer. The the need toget the rest of the weight off was brought right back to the forefront of my mind! Right where it needs to be!
The spiritual renewal came from being up there in the mountains with God and 176 women who came with issues all their own, no less severe to them as mine were to me! We had seminars, services and a big bonfire Saturday night! It was at the bonfire that they gave us paper to write on what we had learned and what we were leaving behind! We were to then throw it in a suitcase, leaving our baggage behind! I left behind jealousy, unhealthy eating habits and my fear of being single forever! It's all a work in progress but I feel much better about the journey!
I do have to admit, I was sitting at the bonfire Saturday when someone said "I can't believe it's 11:00! And I thought of Band Boy at Oh Gradys and I missed being there and wondered if I was missed! Then I realized it didn't matter! God brought me up to that mountain for a reason! The reason being to see that my relationship with Band Boy masks a fear of being single for the rest of my life! And to realize He has wonderful things planned and I shouldn't be afraid! Trust Him! His love is all I need.
This weekend made me realize a lot of things and the main one was the extreme need to get my life back in balance. Before this weekend I didn't know how to do it. Well, I did......but was just afraid that if I did, my friendship with Band Boy would suffer. What if I didn't go to a gig and wasn't missed? So what! Now I can totally see our friendship will suffer (and has to some degree) by me NOT balancing my life! I may not go to every gig......every night........9-1! That doesn't mean I am not supporting Band Boy or believe in him any less than I have before. It means I am working on being the kind of friend I would want to have and the friend I know I can be. That can only be accomplished by getting my life centered and balanced!
I need to trust God by not manipulating the situation! I need to let go and let Him work, not just in me but in Band Boy as well! Only God knows what path Band Boy is on and how I am getting in the way! I knew I was in moving in the right direction when I sat in the chapel before we left Big Bear and prayed. Not for me.......for Band Boy. I prayed that God would bring him the love of his life, the woman who is everything he dreams of and everything he deserves! He is so worthy of that........and so am I. So I prayed that letting go of this situation will allow God to work in both our lives and bring us what we want and need.
So if the objective of the trip was to get away, it was accomplished. If it was to reconnect with my lifegroup friends, it was accomplished in a big way! If it was to gain balance and centering......it is... in the process of being accomplished. I went wanting to reconnect with God, who loves me more than anyone. I went wanting to get peace within my head and my heart. On all levels, the weekend was beyond everything I expected. It was a true gift from God! Like this post? Please share it, bookmark it or leave a comment.
I will never forget where I was when I heard the news! My friend Howard and I were watching "Northern Exposure" when my sister came in with the news that we were going to have an addition to the family! I immediately cried. I couldn't wait to be an aunt again! Her sister, Alexandria, was such a joy that I couldn't wait to my new niece!
Brianna Marie Smith was born on June 27, 1992. She was a beautiful baby! Smiling, happy! And she is growing up to be a beautiful young lady! My only disappointment is that I live to far away to be the aunt I wanted to be! I can't be at her school performances or take her out for ice cream! However, that doesn't mean I can't be a part of her life! I love hearing about the boys, about school and I am VERY excited to hear that she is writing songs! I love getting the emails from her with jokes and fun things! With the internet, we can send mail instantly, view pictures and keep in touch! I am so excited that she is on myspace! Modern technology is allowing Brianna and I a way to keep up with each other!
Brianna is becoming a wonderful young woman! She has many wonderful adventures in store for her and I can't wait to hear/read all about them! Like this post? Please share it, bookmark it or leave a comment.
Brianna Marie Smith was born on June 27, 1992. She was a beautiful baby! Smiling, happy! And she is growing up to be a beautiful young lady! My only disappointment is that I live to far away to be the aunt I wanted to be! I can't be at her school performances or take her out for ice cream! However, that doesn't mean I can't be a part of her life! I love hearing about the boys, about school and I am VERY excited to hear that she is writing songs! I love getting the emails from her with jokes and fun things! With the internet, we can send mail instantly, view pictures and keep in touch! I am so excited that she is on myspace! Modern technology is allowing Brianna and I a way to keep up with each other!
Brianna is becoming a wonderful young woman! She has many wonderful adventures in store for her and I can't wait to hear/read all about them! Like this post? Please share it, bookmark it or leave a comment.
I saw this on EBay and almost swallowed my gum:
http://cgi.ebay.com/CELEBRITY-LUNCH-WITH-STAR-MUSICIAN-JON-BON-JOVI-
Lunch......me.......Jon Bon Jovi, the subject of every dream i've had since I was 21!!! The man I most want to be stranded on an island with! Me, Jon, SPF 50 and a bottomless bottle of Patron Silver!! This lunch would be my chance to invite him to my tropical island slice of heaven!
Then I saw the opening bid, the current bid and definitely swallowed my gum! $9000!! With days to go, that thing is going to climb up to the 10s of thousands of dollars! What's a girl with a dream to do??
I got to thinking and sent this email to my friends:
Oh My Ever Loving God! Who has $20-25k and wants to donate to not only a good cause but to the "Help Cyndie FINALLY get her picture taken With Jon and Die a Happy Woman" fund!
http://cgi.ebay.com/CELEBRITY-LUNCH-WITH-STAR-MUSICIAN-JON-BON-JOVI-
Me.....two other people.............JON "MAN OF EVERY DREAM I'll EVER HAVE IN MY LIFE" BON JOVI! ARRRRGGHH!! Who's in??
I figure if I can find 20, 000 people to donate a dollar, I'm golden! Hey, Jeff! Wanna play at the "Help Cyndie Stalk Bon Jovi" telethon???Oh to dream! Now we all know what I would do with all the money in the world! Now the wheels are turning! If I could find 25--30 thousand people to donate a dollar i'd be golden! It's a tax write off!
Who's in.......donate to giving me time, no matter how short, with the man of my dreams! I have $8. I only need apx. $19, 982!!
:) Like this post? Please share it, bookmark it or leave a comment.
http://cgi.ebay.com/CELEBRITY-LUNCH-WITH-STAR-MUSICIAN-JON-BON-JOVI-
Lunch......me.......Jon Bon Jovi, the subject of every dream i've had since I was 21!!! The man I most want to be stranded on an island with! Me, Jon, SPF 50 and a bottomless bottle of Patron Silver!! This lunch would be my chance to invite him to my tropical island slice of heaven!
Then I saw the opening bid, the current bid and definitely swallowed my gum! $9000!! With days to go, that thing is going to climb up to the 10s of thousands of dollars! What's a girl with a dream to do??
I got to thinking and sent this email to my friends:
Oh My Ever Loving God! Who has $20-25k and wants to donate to not only a good cause but to the "Help Cyndie FINALLY get her picture taken With Jon and Die a Happy Woman" fund!
http://cgi.ebay.com/CELEBRITY-LUNCH-WITH-STAR-MUSICIAN-JON-BON-JOVI-
Me.....two other people.............JON "MAN OF EVERY DREAM I'll EVER HAVE IN MY LIFE" BON JOVI! ARRRRGGHH!! Who's in??
I figure if I can find 20, 000 people to donate a dollar, I'm golden! Hey, Jeff! Wanna play at the "Help Cyndie Stalk Bon Jovi" telethon???Oh to dream! Now we all know what I would do with all the money in the world! Now the wheels are turning! If I could find 25--30 thousand people to donate a dollar i'd be golden! It's a tax write off!
Who's in.......donate to giving me time, no matter how short, with the man of my dreams! I have $8. I only need apx. $19, 982!!
:) Like this post? Please share it, bookmark it or leave a comment.
I was in Manhattan Beach with my roommate and my mom yesterday! It was a gorgeous day to be down there! The sky was sunny, the water sparkly and all the dyed blonde, surgically enhanced women were out in force! As much as that is one of my favorite places in all of Southern California, it isn't the best of places to go if your self-confidence is a few notches low.
The funny thing is that the woman that got me to thinking about my less than stellar body wasn't even blonde. The beautiful woman that crossed in the crosswalk in front of me while we were stopped at a red light was a brunette. What got me to thinking wasn't her hair color. It was her killer body! I said to my roommate, who was riding shotgun in the car much as she does in my life, "If I had a killer body like that, Band Boy would like me". She says "No way! If you had a body like that, you would be such a bitch even I wouldn't like you". We laughed hysterically! What a perfect thing to say to stop me dead in my tracks! I was truly on a one-way trip to Pitty Junction! What the comment did, though, was make me wonder if I truly would give up who I am to make someone else like me! Not likely!
When men look at woman with a killer body, what are they thinking about? Is it wow, I wonder what she thinks of the war in Iraq? Do they stop and consider if she would be the type that would crash on the couch to watch the Laker game and ask for a beer and nachos? Do they wonder what she thinks of the new Poison retrospective CD? NO! I can pretty much guarantee what any man will be thinking of when they look at a woman like that. It has nothing to do with her mind what so ever!
I have never had the killer body! So I have had to make up with it by being the funny, smart girl! I have always had friends in bands and have hung out in bars and clubs since I was in high school. I have never had a problem getting attention from guys although it might not be the attention I am looking for. For the most part, I am seen as non-threatning to the ego. They sit and talk to me about brainy crap, get a boost to the ego before they go over to slobber over the hottie and ask for that booty call. Whats funny is when they come crawling back to me when she shoots them down! Whats not funny is when they leave to go hook up and I am left alone and sad, waiting for my hopes to be built up by the next sad fool to come along.
Here is deal: while I think I would like the guy to slobber over me, to look at me and go wow, to get the booty call offer, I wouldnt know what to do with it if I got it. The thing is I am not going to have sex before marriage. Its a deal breaker for me! Non-negotiable. So for any man to proposition me like that would be pointless and a waste of time for all involved.
Truth be told, I like being the smart chick! I love making people laugh! These are also qualities that I look for in men and qualities I wouldnt give up for anything! I think it is society that makes me think I want the other! I am made to think that I am less than desirable if I am not a size 0, Paris Hilton wannabe! Bull! The Paris Hilton's of the world are great if the booty call is all you want. But even a superficial guy is going to want someone eventually that can carry on a conversation! Even the biggest creep is going to eventually want someone to ask him about his day, to care less about themselves and more about him! That is where a brainy, funny, caring chick is going to look very hot!
I have to be totally honest here: if Band Boy only wanted me for my killer body, I most likely would have nothing to do with him! I love a guy who is smart, who is funny and would ask me how my day went. I want the brainy, funny guy! I am not going to give the superficial guy the time of day! I need an intellectual equal, a guy who can challenge me mentally and I can challenge him!
I am reminded of that bumper sticker: I may be fat but you are ugly and I can diet. The same holds true for being a funny, smart chick! I can diet, I can tone up, I could conceivably have that killer body! And I could have my music addicted, sports loving, funny and smart personality on top of it! Holding on to my beliefs and staying true to myself will only stand to benefit me and the man I eventually marry! That makes me a hot chick despite my less than killer body! Like this post? Please share it, bookmark it or leave a comment.
The funny thing is that the woman that got me to thinking about my less than stellar body wasn't even blonde. The beautiful woman that crossed in the crosswalk in front of me while we were stopped at a red light was a brunette. What got me to thinking wasn't her hair color. It was her killer body! I said to my roommate, who was riding shotgun in the car much as she does in my life, "If I had a killer body like that, Band Boy would like me". She says "No way! If you had a body like that, you would be such a bitch even I wouldn't like you". We laughed hysterically! What a perfect thing to say to stop me dead in my tracks! I was truly on a one-way trip to Pitty Junction! What the comment did, though, was make me wonder if I truly would give up who I am to make someone else like me! Not likely!
When men look at woman with a killer body, what are they thinking about? Is it wow, I wonder what she thinks of the war in Iraq? Do they stop and consider if she would be the type that would crash on the couch to watch the Laker game and ask for a beer and nachos? Do they wonder what she thinks of the new Poison retrospective CD? NO! I can pretty much guarantee what any man will be thinking of when they look at a woman like that. It has nothing to do with her mind what so ever!
I have never had the killer body! So I have had to make up with it by being the funny, smart girl! I have always had friends in bands and have hung out in bars and clubs since I was in high school. I have never had a problem getting attention from guys although it might not be the attention I am looking for. For the most part, I am seen as non-threatning to the ego. They sit and talk to me about brainy crap, get a boost to the ego before they go over to slobber over the hottie and ask for that booty call. Whats funny is when they come crawling back to me when she shoots them down! Whats not funny is when they leave to go hook up and I am left alone and sad, waiting for my hopes to be built up by the next sad fool to come along.
Here is deal: while I think I would like the guy to slobber over me, to look at me and go wow, to get the booty call offer, I wouldnt know what to do with it if I got it. The thing is I am not going to have sex before marriage. Its a deal breaker for me! Non-negotiable. So for any man to proposition me like that would be pointless and a waste of time for all involved.
Truth be told, I like being the smart chick! I love making people laugh! These are also qualities that I look for in men and qualities I wouldnt give up for anything! I think it is society that makes me think I want the other! I am made to think that I am less than desirable if I am not a size 0, Paris Hilton wannabe! Bull! The Paris Hilton's of the world are great if the booty call is all you want. But even a superficial guy is going to want someone eventually that can carry on a conversation! Even the biggest creep is going to eventually want someone to ask him about his day, to care less about themselves and more about him! That is where a brainy, funny, caring chick is going to look very hot!
I have to be totally honest here: if Band Boy only wanted me for my killer body, I most likely would have nothing to do with him! I love a guy who is smart, who is funny and would ask me how my day went. I want the brainy, funny guy! I am not going to give the superficial guy the time of day! I need an intellectual equal, a guy who can challenge me mentally and I can challenge him!
I am reminded of that bumper sticker: I may be fat but you are ugly and I can diet. The same holds true for being a funny, smart chick! I can diet, I can tone up, I could conceivably have that killer body! And I could have my music addicted, sports loving, funny and smart personality on top of it! Holding on to my beliefs and staying true to myself will only stand to benefit me and the man I eventually marry! That makes me a hot chick despite my less than killer body! Like this post? Please share it, bookmark it or leave a comment.
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